respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
