ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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