We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He better not be in your backpack
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
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