Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
