I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
