Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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