If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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