so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize