I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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