I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
