Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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