I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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