Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
