You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
