shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
