So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
