Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
