Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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