Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
