My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I use my feet as sexual weapons
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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