I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
