sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
