my room smells like sperm. sweet.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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