GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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