im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
