Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
