we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
