am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
