we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
