Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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