who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
