Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
