He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
