kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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