i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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