I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
