How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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