Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
