Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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