Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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