Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
