I feel like abortions should bother me more
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
