YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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