I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Randomize