I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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