You're my little dorito
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
