I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Randomize
