no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
