My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
