i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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